Father’s Day is a day to let Dad know we care about him just as much as he cares about us. It is on this day that we celebrate the men who have been there to teach us, those that have guided us, protected us, and … made us swoon.
I know you’re thinking this is wrong, wrong, wrong and anyone who keeps tabs on the hot dads of others must have some sort of ‘daddy-issue’ of her own, but I can assure you I do not and this is all sorts of right if you can recognize a good looking man when you see one.
This is a list of dad crushes and appreciated fathers of a very specific focus, leaving out the neighbors’ husbands and my friends’ dads (much to their relief). What we’re looking at here are the dads and father figures of the horror genre, an archetype that has since evolved by way of appearance and family involvement. Modern generations have appropriated the term ‘daddy’, once used to solely label our own fathers while we were children, to now refer to other attractive, older, men of all kinds including those with fit, rock hard abs to the worship of the ‘dad-bod’ in all its glory. We might as well enjoy the gratuity these casting directors have thrown at us and let our insides fill with butterflies before the gore and jump scares become a distraction.
Let’s take a taboo look at the dreamiest daddies of horror, in every sense of the term you’d like to apply:
Jesse Hellman in The Devil’s Candy
What line do I need to get in to meet a man that has great taste in music, has mad artistic skills, and has a super ripped body? While watching The Devil’s Candy, I kept thinking about how good of a dad Ethan Embry’s Jesse Hellman is to his daughter as he encourages her to be a confident individual, and how much I wanted to join their family. It’s clear to anyone with eyes that Ethan Embry has gone from playing the hopeless, hapless, friendzone inhabitant to the role of a bad-ass, hard core, head-banging king. His portrayal of Jesse Hellman has redefined the typical ‘dad’ image, bringing on a new wave of ‘cool dads’ to the horror genre. So metal. So devilishly hot.
The Devil’s Candy? More like The Eye Candy, am I right?
Leo Barnes in The Purge Anarchy
I know how the typical saying goes, but in my experience I believe revenge is a dish best served piping hot and I consider Frank Grillo’s Sergeant Leo Barnes to raise mercury when it comes to that. The vengeful father is hellbent on taking full opportunity of murdering the man responsible for his young son’s death the night of the annual Purge, but he also has a tender heart for the innocent and helps them live through the night no matter the cost. Under that black trench coat, armored car, and dark smouldering look, Leo is a protective softie at heart. Major daddy vibes!
Leo, well, Grillo, gets bonus points for having great hair too.
Michael Hamilton in The Cloverfield Paradox
Quite possibly the only one on this list that makes all of the right decisions while also being the most compassionate is Michael Hamilton (Roger Davies), husband to engineer Ava Hamilton. Ava leaves her husband back on Earth to board the orbiting Cloverfield Station in hopes of saving the planet from a debilitating energy crisis. Aside from allowing her to go without so much as a plea, he is a real man who supports his wife’s intelligence, decisions, and abilities. Michael is the man running into the terrible unknown attack to offer his professional assistance when a more immediate crisis occurs. We learn that crisis is New York City being deconstructed by one of our favorite movie monsters, Clover. His care for a stranded little girl and sincere love for his wife stuck in space is a recipe for not only a good former dad, but also for a good man.
Plus… look at those biceps and appled cheek bones! I don’t know which I want to grab first. The Cloverfield Paradox lacked in a lot of areas, mostly in Michael Hamilton screen time.
George Lutz in The Amityville Horror (2005)
Whether you’re attracted to men or not, I think everyone can back me up when I say Ryan Reynolds as George Lutz in the 2005 remake of The Amityville Horror is one of the hottest dads in cinema. That body of his would have me burning through firewood in hopes he’d go outside to chop some more so often that the ghosts would flee on their own from smoke inhalation quicker than the Lutz’s did. Who needs a priest?
Why the kids have such negative feelings about him becoming their stepdad is beyond me. I’d be willing, eagerly, to take up residency with George at the Amityville house, oozing walls and all.
Lee Abbott in A Quiet Place
Anyone into the strong, silent type? If existing with John Krasinski’s Lee Abbott means a vow of silence, then consider me forever on ‘mute’. I think what makes Lee so appealing to viewers of this year’s breakout films, A Quiet Place, is the familiarity and comfort most of us have with him as loveable Jim of The Office, but Krasinski has since matured in both his career and his look. Lee is intelligent, bold, and, like Jim, a bit of a romantic. Silent swoon!
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Say goodbye to the days of Krasinski playing the cute, sweet, funny co-worker and hello to the crafty, well-built, and handsomely bearded leading man we’d gladly sit tight in silence through the apocalypse for. Monopoly, anyone?
Will in The Invitation
Speaking of quiet types, Logan Marshall-Green as the paranoid dinner guest Will in Karen Kusama’s The Invitation is one smoking brooder. Green has recently made a bit of a name for himself in the horror community with starring roles in M. Night Shyamalan’s thriller Devil and Leigh Whannell’s super charged Upgrade, but it’s this particular serious role of a grieving father suspicious of his ex-wife’s dinner party motives that has really drawn our attention. His tortured performance full of sizzling glances and lingering stares is intriguing and, despite the emotional pain he’s feeling over the loss of his son, is unfortunately quite sexy. Who wouldn’t want to haveWill sulking in their lap while running fingers through those long locks?
There is no mystery behind it, Will is the white hot flame of this slow burn.
John Form in Annabelle
Have you ever met a man so smart, yet his common sense skills are a little… off? Dr. John Form is one of those guys. He is a clean cut, all American, Boy Scout of a man who is focused on achieving his goals and being enclosed within a white picket fence with his wife and growing family.
If you dig pleated pants, sweater vests, and having a hot dinner ready on the table for your husband when he arrives home from work (despite an obvious household haunting) then John is the ideal daddy. His pearly white smile and perfectly parted hair makes it a little easier to forgive him for ignorantly gifting his pregnant wife with a deadly, obviously creepy, conduit doll in Annabelle. It’s the thought that counts so we’ll gladly accept the sweet stupid sting from this handsome WASP.
Johnathan Shannon in Wish Upon
Theres a clever saying people use down here in the south that applies well to Ryan Phillippe’s character Johnathan Shannon, in Wish Upon. It is used most commonly when someone wants to “politely” pity you without sounding mean: Bless is heart.
The role is not exactly ground-breaking front neither is the film, but it is Ryan Phillippe so naturally some part of you is going to react to his level of bad boy charm.
Normally, a man that can be found rummaging through the town’s trash cans as an all-day hobby is not truly an appealing quality I seek out in a man, but I’d be willing to make an exception here.
Imagine if he was your dad, or better yet, imagine if he was your friend’s dad? I knew exactly how Barb (Shannon Pursor who plays Phillippe’s daughter’s friend, but she will always be Barb) felt when she stared at him, mouth agape, while he pumped out some sizzling tunes from his saxophone. Oh yeah, did I mention he is a jazz musician? It’s not necessary for him to utter any of the poorly written lines for us to appreciate him for exactly what he is: a hot, dumpster diving, saxophone playing, widowed hoarder.
Yeah… I’d still go for him.
Tom Witzky in Stir of Echoes
Kevin Bacon’s Tom Witzky is the hot, young dad on the block in Stir of Echoes. Though him and his wife have been forced from the party scene to settle in the more suburban part of town to raise their son, Tom still knows how to have a good time. He too is a modern, sexy rocker dad who appreciates a snug t-shirt and a good vinyl. I’d be okay with him destroying the backyard in search of a random dead girl’s body if it meant he’d do it shirtless each time.
I don’t want to objectify Bacon too much as he is a pretty talented actor, he’s just never really been my cup of tea aside from this film. Tom Witzky and his 90’s post-grunge demeanor must have me hypnotized…
Seok-Woo in Train to Busan
Does anyone love a professionally dressed man in a tailored suit covered in sweat and blood as much as I do?
Workaholic Seok-Woo in Yeon-Sang ho’s epic South Korean zombie thriller Train to Busan might start off as an absent minded, selfish man trapped in the middle of a horrendous undead outbreak with his young daughter, but it’s his protective and ultimately selfless decisions that redeem him as a character and as a father. He is an extremely good looking and confident man that just needed a reality check. Being aware of the errors of his ways only makes him that much more attractive. If I was going to be trapped on a train I wouldn’t mind the uncomfortable claustrophobia nor the impending doom-by-zombies-masses if it meant he’d be close to me!
Sacrifice is always hot and always gets a guy extra points in this genre.
Dr. Steven Murphy in The Killing Of a Sacred Deer
I briefly hesitated a little when adding Colin Farrell’s odd character from the divisive The Killing of A Sacred Deer mostly because of two reasons: 1. Out of all the dads on this list and in general, he’s pretty much the worst as far as decision making and being selfish and 2. His intimacy predelicition towards getting off on his wife acting like a corpse was decidedly a huge turn-off to me… or was it?
Thanks to some sage reasoning from a trusted fellow Contributor (Thanks, Tyler!), Dr. Steven Murphy made this list by the scrape of a scalpel. His intimacy kinks are not to be judged as he is, on the outside, hot all over. You know what they say about what goes on behind closed doors.
The thick handsome beard, hairy chest, kind eyes, the accent, and the fact that all of those are attached to Collin Farrell was enough to win me over (combined with a palette cleansing viewing of Sophia’s Coppola’s The Beguiled).
As much as I hate to admit, this cardiovascular surgeon did indeed get my heart pumping whether he liked that or not.
Jim Hopper in Stranger Things
While Chief Jim Hopper is adult mourning the loss of his daughter at the start of Stranger Things, he is a reborn daddy the minute he takes in Eleven come the second season. Their relationship is absolutely adorable and pulls on our heartstrings in the best of ways.
But that’s not why Jim makes this list.
David Harbour, specifically as Hopper, has one of the best dad-bods in horror and science-fiction alike. I like 6-pack abs just as much as the next girl, but hugging up on a dad-bod like his is my heart’s truest desire. Hopper is a good looking testament to attractive beer guts everywhere and proves that dad-bod is THE real deal.
Average is sexy, so is a uniform. We totally dig it, guys.
Adam Maitland in Beetlejuice
Though considerably a stretch, this suggested from another fellow Contributor (Thanks, Jessica!) couldn’t go unnoticed. Adam Maitland is not a father in Beetlejuice, but rather he acts like a dad to our favorite outsider, Lydia, and is certainly more of a father figure to her than her own. Adam’s willingness to step up to the plate when so many real fathers bow out, gives him enough dad credit to be considered for the list.
What really qualifies Alec Baldwin’s early role is that Adam is living and breathing (sort of) Dad-style incarnate. The khakis, the glasses, the belt, the plaid, the modeling hobby. Adam is all dad from the inside out without actually being one and for some, I’m assuming, psychologically explainable reason we find him to be completely crush-worthy, ironically hitting us right in our amorous feelings.
Adam is the one dad on this list we can safely fantasize about only because he is not a dad by law nor by biology.
ADS ARE SCARY
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He can haunt my house anytime.
Lucifer in Rosemary’s Baby
As one of our brilliant Nightmare on Film Street hosts pointed out, I really can’t complete this list without including the biggest, baddest, and most physically hottest dad in all of horror and cinema, the devil himself (Thanks, Kim!).
He’s actually fiery and steamy, being the King of Hell and all, and is, biologically, father to the otherworldly offspring he’s forced upon poor Rosemary in Roman Polanski’s Rosemary’s Baby. He may not be a pleasant looker, unless your into horns, hoofs, and a tail, but I’m gonna label him the ‘wild card’ of this list because all groups need one. Looks are subjective, so the criteria for being a ‘hot dad’ of horror is not necessarily reliant on outer appearance alone.
Lucifer is the hottest, literally.
There you have it, a sizzling handful of dreamy dads to make your Father’s Day either super uncomfortable or a lot more enjoyable. Horror is getting hotter and hotter every day and the cast lists for the roles of daddies, I mean, fathers is setting off smoke alarms in all directions. If we have to face flesh-eating zombies, tormenting demons, blood hungry murderers, invading creatures, and the inevitable end of the world why not sit back, embrace the modern times, and enjoy the view?
Happy Father’s Day to all you dads out there! You’re all automatic additions to this list for being horror fans to begin with.