The harvest moon has lit the October night sky, and the spirits have become restless. Spooky season is in full effect, and with it arises the annual horror event unlike any other, Universal’s Halloween Horror Nights.
The 2024 event brings a whole new set of terrors for those who dare enter. From human flesh-hungry goblins to the Frozen Empire, from murderous triplets to “Tiptoe Through the Tulips“, let’s enter the land where horror lives to review each terrifying attraction. Here are the 10 haunted houses of Universal Orlando’s Halloween Horror Nights 33, RANKED!
10. A Quiet Place
“Make a sound and you won’t last long. Monstrous creatures will hunt you down as the world of the first two films comes to terrifying life.”
If you’ve ever ventured through a HHN house, you understand the impossible task of creating a “quiet” environment. And impossible it was. I may have built expectations a bit too high for what could be done with such a unique premise. In actuality, the movies don’t provide many opportunities for creative scare actors outside of the slap-happy aliens, crying babies, and the rando old screaming old man. Yet, what actually was done here was pretty cool nonetheless.
To it’s credit, A Quiet Place succeeds in disorienting maze goers from the very beginning visually and audibly, even if its not via lack of sound. A walkthrough of the first two films in the franchise, the detailed recreations of the most infamous scenes will surely bring smiles to fans’ faces. When they’re not screaming, of course. The overall effect of this house is greatly dependent on the group of people that enter it with you, so if you find yourself in the middle of a real overzealous crowd, I’d recommend giving it another go.
9. Universal Monsters: Eternal Bloodlines
“Get caught in an epic battle as Saskia Van Helsing and the Bride of Frankenstein go up against Dracula’s daughter and her monstrous mavens.”
It’s hard to call any HHN maze a misfire, as even the worst-received houses in the event’s history are still some of the coolest attractions you’ll ever see. When compared to it’s Universal Monsters predecessors of the previous two years, however, Eternal Bloodlines doesn’t live up to it’s name’s rock solid reputation.
A few too many dead spots (no pun intended), dialogue too long for guests to fully hear, and a story told visually at a breakneck speed, the maze requires multiple visits just to understand what the hell is going on. Still, it’s always a blast to see the classic monsters in action. The sets, albeit fewer than expected, are stunning as always and cover a wide array of the creatures’ domains, a calling card of Universal Monsters mazes of old.
8. The Museum: Deadly Exhibits
“A folklore museum’s newest exhibit, The Rotting Stone, has released an evil spirit that decays everything. And it’s coming for you.”
One of the houses atop my early hype list, The Museum: Deadly Exhibits turns your everyday small town museum into a living, breathing nightmare. Infecting everything it touches, the “Rotting Stone” spreads evil across the folklore exhibits like a fungus. Though I expected something akin to Night at the Museum if it was directed by James Wan, what is given is a much more intimate and claustrophobic maze.
Small scale but incredibly effective visual tricks, including pulsating lighting tubes and mirrors turning 3 mannequins into 30, reinforce the illusion that the museum is legitimately alive. I do wish they would’ve gone a step further with the overall scale, but it’s hard to argue with possessed mummies and Viking figures stepping out of their displays to scare you. And there’s just something a little creepy about those small town museums that Deadly Exhibits captures.
7. Major Sweets Candy Factory
“You’re chaperoning a fieldtrip to a candy factory when the free samples transform the kids into candy-coated killers.”
As a rule of thumb, the house chosen for the Fast and Furious: Supercharged building typically isn’t anything to write home over. Due in part to a difficult building footprint to fit into, and perhaps just by chance, Chucky: Ultimate Kill Count of HHN 32 and The Horrors of Blumhouse of 31 both failed to compare to their event brethren. Despite coming in at the seventh spot, Major Sweets Candy Factory handily takes the crown of the goriest house of the year, and sets itself apart as an overall upgrade at the challenging location.
Billed as a candy manufacturing plant dishing out some sinister samples to a touring group of school children, the theming of Major Sweets is top notch, starting at the very beginning with the house’s brick factory facade. The gore is the real star of the maze, however. Extremely gnarly mannequin work depicts death by disembowelment, engorgement, and other bizarre ways. Blood, guts, and vomit (0h, the vomit) galore, those with weak stomachs beware.
6. Monstruos: The Monsters of Latin America
“¡Ten cuidado! With La Muerte as your guide, try to survive the night with three terrifying legends: Tlahuelpuchi, La Lechuza and El Silbón.”
We’ve arrived at the point in the rankings where each house could legitimately be higher up the board than it is. It’s not a good day to be baby within Monstruos: The Monsters of Latin America. An acclaimed house first featured at HHN Hollywood in 2023, Orlando received an expanded version of the maze for 2024. Why the baby hate you may ask? Well, these beasts either really hate babies, find them extremely delicious, or both. Either way, it doesn’t end well for them.
One of the scariest houses of the year, Monstruos depicts several deeply upsetting legends from Latin American culture. Beautiful set pieces home to horrifying sequences are found around every curtain and corner. A calling card of the California original, the awe-inspiring puppetry used brings these creatures into a realm of realism that will scare your socks off. One pass through the maze will have dedicated horror fans pulling out their phones to research these monsters in depth.
5. Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire
“An ancient artifact has released a chilling new entity, Garraka. He’ll stop you cold. Only the Ghostbusters can keep you from getting iced.”
To preface the fifth ranked spot, I have not seen Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire the film. Don’t fret if you’re in the same boat, as it’s not necessary to appreciate the intense dedication to detail poured into this house. If you don’t get caught up in the finer points, the insane scale of the sets will leave you frozen in awe. Get it? Frozen?! The breathtakingly gigantic sets may be the most extravagant of the ten this year, depicting locations such as Ray’s Occult Books and the snowy Ghostbuster’s Firehouse.
Scattered about are the legendary ghosts of the franchise, including the Slimer, the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Men, and the newest villain, the towering and terrifying Garraka. Unsurprisingly, the costume work on the ghosts are second to none, as it truly feels as if you’re inside the movie. Classic HHN. An unsung hero of the house – the lighting design for the proton pack beams, which are some of the most astounding effects I’ve seen in a haunted house to date. Put simply, Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire is easily one of the coolest houses of the year. I’ll see myself out.
4. Goblin’s Feast
“Enter a goblin village, where a feast is being prepared for goblins, orcs, hobgoblins and witches. And you’re the main course.”
The most humorous house of the bunch, Goblin’s Feast is a gory good time from start to finish, Beginning with a goblin gleefully dancing a medieval jig, guests proceed through the middle of a harvest celebration put on by the mythical monsters, with humans as their bountiful crop.
From the head designer responsible for some of the most breathtaking houses in HHN history, including 2023’s Bloodmoon: Dark Offerings and 2022’s Dead Man’s Pier: Winter’s Wake, it’s no surprise that Goblin’s Feast contains some of the most detailed and impressive scenery of all ten houses. A functioning water wheel, oversized puppetry, and gore galore litter a house themed perfectly to the cold, damp, candle-lit feel of a middle age manor. Houses like Goblin’s Feast really illustrate the levels of art that cement HHN as an event unlike any other of it’s kind.
3. Triplets of Terror
“You’re invited to the Barmy triplets’ birthday celebration. But their kind of party involves recreating the murders of their entire family.”
Think Bob’s Burgers if Tina, Gene, and Louise turned into bloodthirsty, rabid slashers. As the story goes, the Barmy kids went murder beast mode on their family in 1984, and proceed to replicate their birthday massacre in a different town every 10 years. A 40 year time jump later, the siblings bring their gory festivities to a small Pennsylvania town.
To my knowledge, Triplets of Terror represents one of the first non-IP houses at HHN based upon original slasher characters, and the designers wasted no energy creating a house full of campy slasher movie goodness. Within my first few steps into this house, which involved walking through a (legitimately) rainy night into the 1984 Barmy home, it was clear the maze would be a home run for the 80’s slasher fan in me. From there, guests stroll through an entire modern small-scall town amidst the killer carnage, which I absolutely loved. The inventive kills, creepy as hell setting/scenery, and true-crime flavor vault Triplets of Terror into my top 3 of the year.
Countless sleepless nights I laid awake, performing mental gymnastics trying to rank the final two houses (only half joking). In the end, I simply can’t bring myself to pick one over the other. My reasoning is rock solid though, so stick with me! I present the final spots, 1B and 1A.
1B. Insidious: The Further
“Enter The Further as demons try to ensnare you. The Red-Faced Demon will lure you into his lair. KeyFace will unlock your fears. And more.”
Tied for the top spot is hands down the scariest house of HHN 33 and possibly in the conversation of all time, Insidious: The Further. A fusion of each visit into “The Further” from every Insidious entry, the maze incorporates every horrible entity to date, including The Lipstick Face Demon, Keyface, The Man Who Can’t Breathe, and The Bride in Black.
A match made in horror heaven – arguably the scariest haunted house franchise ever, in the hands of the aforementioned lauded HHN designer of Goblin’s Feast. The results? The quintessential haunted house experience. Unrelenting scare actors in screen quality costumes, scenes straight out of the nightmares of the films, and greatest of all, a maze that simply DOES NOT END. The panic and tension created when you think the maze is over, then its not, then it’s still not, and still not, all the while scares continuously rain down? Speechless. As a huge fan of the franchise and of haunted houses in general, it doesn’t get much better than this.
1A. Slaughter Sinema 2
“It’s time for another horror movie marathon at the Carey Drive-in! Scream through scenes from creature features, grindhouse gore and more.”
With Slaughter Sinema 2, we shift gears from the scariest house of them all, to simply one of the most fun houses I’ve ever had the pleasure to experience. A sequel to 2018’s Slaughter Sinema, guests enter the Carey Drive In and are dropped in the middle of eight fictional B-movies that you’ll sorely wish actually existed. Grindhouse flicks such as Heavy Metal Hell 3D, Night of the Undead Clowns, Mummy Strippers: Unwrapped, and Killer Kringles represent just half of the schlocky greatness that awaits.
Everything about Slaughter Sinema 2 brought a big smile to my face. To name a few – In the queue, a drive-in screen plays actual-filmed trailers to each fictional movie. A giant puppet shark head jumps out to bite at guests in Blood and Chum. Scare actors dressed as neon lit zombie cyborgs take the gold for best costumes in Zyborgs, a movie that will bring about flashbacks to the Jamie Lee Curtis led Virus. (1999). If I ever win the lottery, I will be turning my basement into an exact replica of this house.
How would you rank the houses of Universal Orlando’s Halloween Horror Nights 33? Did you also dance uncontrollably to “Tiptoe Though the Tulips” like every other guest walking through Insidious: The Further? Which haunted house would you recreate in your basement? Share your thoughts on the official Nightmare on Film Street Discord!
